Archive for June, 2008

Bell Guy, circa 1973.

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Bell Guy and I planned Saturday to go to Baltimore to meet some of his friends and take in the Gay Pride Parade. My first Gay Pride event in my young tenure as an old gay guy.

We made it up there in the early afternoon and met a friend for lunch. I didn’t eat much as I was feeling bloated and a little off.

After lunch we walked around a bit, waiting for the parade to begin, and chatted with other friends of friends in a gay bar near the parade route. It was warm and there was little shade so it was nice to be inside. I went to the bathroom, still feeling off but returned a few seconds later.

About five minutes later, I returned to the bathroom and the toilet was being used. So I barfed in the sink. That’s right, for the first time since I can remember, I barfed. I barfed a lot. Guys came in and asked if I was okay which was nice of them. One asked if I had too much to drink. No, that wasn’t it. I do not drink at all. He wondered aloud what it could be as he left the bathroom. I texted Bell Guy that I needed help and by the time he got the text I was out of the bathroom. I felt better but was told that I looked “a little green.”

Longer story short, we took a cab back to friend’s apartment, got Bell Guy’s car and returned apartment keys back to friend at the parade route. Actually Bell Guy did. I sat in the car. He prepared a triple layer barf sack from plastic grocery bags and we headed back towards DC. We missed the entire parade.

About half way down I-95, I told him it would be a miracle if I made it back to his place without barfing again. He was surprised that I said that. Five minutes later I did barf again and nearly filled up the triple layer barf sack. So gross.

We arrived back at his place at about 5pm. I asked if Bell Guy had any irritating neighbors he wanted me to leave the barf sack with, but he declined. We went upstairs and I got in bed. Bell Guy set up a barf bucket. About 9pm that night I got barfed again and at that point there was little left in my stomach and, you know, barfing on an empty stomach hurts like hell.

Needless to say I did not sleep well Saturday night. Although I did not get sick, I was uncomfortable. Yesterday I stayed in bed all day and ate virtually nothing but did not get sick.

Today I was back at work but felt woozy until I had some lunch. I lost almost five pounds between Friday and this morning. Yikes. All appears well now and I hope it is a few more years until I barf again. Thanks to Bell Guy for being a great Barf Buddy.

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By Alice Park, Time Writer

What makes people gay? Biologists may never get a complete answer to that question, but researchers in Sweden have found one more sign that the answer lies in the structure of the brain.

Scientists at the Karolinska Institute studied brain scans of 90 gay and straight men and women, and found that the size of the two symmetrical halves of the brains of gay men more closely resembled those of straight women than they did straight men. In heterosexual women, the two halves of the brain are more or less the same size. In heterosexual men, the right hemisphere is slightly larger. Scans of the brains of gay men in the study, however, showed that their hemispheres were relatively symmetrical, like those of straight women, while the brains of homosexual women were asymmetrical like those of straight men. The number of nerves connecting the two sides of the brains of gay men were also more like the number in heterosexual women than in straight men.

Just what these brain differences mean is still not clear. Ever since 1991, when Simon LeVay first documented differences in the hypothalamus of gay and straight men, researchers have been struggling to understand what causes these differences to occur. Until now, the brain regions that scientists have come to believe play a role in sexual orientation have been related to either reproduction or sexuality. The Swedish study, however, is the first to find differences in parts of the brain not normally involved in reproduction — the denser network of nerve connections, for example, was found in the amygdala, known as the emotional center of the brain. “The big question has always been, if the brains of gay men are different, or feminized, as earlier research suggests,” says Dr. Eric Vilain, professor of human genetics at University of California Los Angeles, “then is it just limited to sexual preference or are there other regions that are gender atypical in gay males? For the first time, in this study it looks like there are regions of the brain not directly involved in sexuality that seem to be feminized in gay males.”

Vilain, who studies the genetic factors behind sexuality and sexual orientation, notes that it may turn out that the brains of gay men possess only some ‘feminized’ structures, while retaining some masculine ones, and this is reflected in how they act on their sexuality. “We know from studies that men, regardless of their sexual orientation, retain masculine characteristics when it comes to their sexual behavior,” he says. Both gay and straight men, for example, tend to prefer younger partners, in contrast to women, who gravitate toward older partners. Most men are also more likely than women to engage in casual sex, and to be aroused by visual stimuli. “So I expect that some regions of the brain will remain masculine even in gay men,” says Vilain. For something as complex as sexual orientation, it’s no surprise that everything from genes to gender to environment may play a role in ultimately determining your perfect partner.

source: time.com

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(06-16) 18:33 PDT SAN FRANCISCO — Cheers filled San Francisco’s City Hall shortly after 5 p.m. as longtime lesbian activists Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin, partners for more than 50 years, began their second wedding – and their first legal union.

Mayor Gavin Newsom, who officiated the ceremony in the reception area of his office, said it was a fitting way to memorialize last month’s state Supreme Court decision legalizing same-sex marriage in California, which took effect at 5:01 p.m.

Lyon, 83, and Martin, 87, were the first couple married four years ago when Newsom told the county clerk’s office to start offering marriage certificates to same-sex couples. Eventually more than 4,000 same-sex couples were married in San Francisco that year, but those unions were later nullified by the court. Today, the couple, and dozens of others, had their first chance to make their unions truly legal.

source: san francisco chronicle

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Gossip Gone

Many months ago I wrote about Gossip, a trusted manager and “friend” that questioned my sexuality with another manager at work. Over the last few months, I have tried to work from home more and let the management of that office run that office without me being involved day to day.

Anyways, Gossip began to make some pretty big mistakes and our General Manager began to get involved. Gossip felt that she was being picked on and instead of coming to me about it, she decided to resign. Her last day was supposed this coming Monday.

We promoted someone to take Gossip’s job and while she was discussing her responsibilities with the new person, this conversation took place:

Gossip: What did they offer you?

Newbie: $34,000

Gossip: I’m making $38,000. You need to go back and ask them for more.

What a bitch. Because she broke policy and decided it would be fun to stick it to us with that conversation, we had to send Gossip packing this past Monday. Her position being vacant this week has made life rather difficult, but her attitude was so poor it was the right decision.

Oh, we had to pay Newbie more to accept the position.

Good riddance Gossip.

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Bell Guy’s Mom was in town this weekend so I had the opportunity to spend the day with them yesterday. This was the first opportunity I have had to meet a member of his family, and he and his Mom are extremely close.

We began the day with an early lunch at a yummy small, local, chain restaurant. Bell Guy and his Mom are very much alike and she was very nice and warm. A delicate flower really.

After lunch we ventured out in the searing heat and headed to Lincoln’s Cottage. This cottage, in Northwest Washington, was where President Lincoln spent his evenings and weekends from May through November during his presidency. Located high above downtown Washington, he liked it there because it was removed from the city and had nice breezes. He rode his horse to the White House every day. The cottage was recently restored and is now open to the public. The three of us were the only ones that had a reservation for the tour, so it turned into a private affair. While it was the guide’s first day on his own, he did a good job and I liked the house and grounds.

After lunch, Bell Guy and Ma Bell went shopping and I went home to take care of some chores. Since my wife was out of town, we decided that they would come out to my house and then we’d have dinner nearby. They arrived at my house a few hours later and, after giving Ma Bell a tour of Bell Guy’s future temporary quarters, we went to dinner. The dinner was good and capped off an enjoyable day.

After dinner, they dropped me off at my house and they ventured back to Bell Guy’s apartment. Today, they visited a museum in Baltimore before Ma Bell flew back to Vermont.

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Six Months

As of today, Bell Guy and I have been together for six months. I am so lucky to have found him so quickly after I came out and am grateful for his presence in my life. Love ya babe!

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…does Best Buy request an ID when purchasing a CD but not when purchasing an expensive TV? Yes, the signature line is a worn but had the signature been legible but the card stolen, all would have been kosher.

…did the Arby’s guy give me Sweet and Low after he asked what kind of sauce I wanted at the window? The tea was already sweet. The sandwich was not.

…did the soccer mom with the “kid’s first” license plate nearly run me off the road in front of an elementary school?

…did all those oddities happen within thirty minutes if one another?

…is my life so boring I decided to blog about it?

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